By Kayla Mustain
- Too much ∏ gives you a large circumference.
- Parallel lines have so much in common, it’s a shame they will never meet!
- Your PLAN has been foiled
- √-1 2^3 ∑ ∏ …and it was delicious
- I before E… except when you run a feisty heist on a weird beige foreign neighbor.
- What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
- My English teacher held a pun contest. I submitted ten puns to win, but no pun in ten did.
- You can’t run through a campground. You can only ran because it’s past tents.
- 8 vowels, 11 consonants, an exclamation mark and a comma appeared in court today. They are due to be sentenced next week.
- I tried to grab fog, but I mist.
- I lost an electron! Are you positive?
- When chemists die, they barium.
- Energizer bunny arrested. It was charged with battery.
- Why were the Middle Ages called the Dark Ages? There were too many knights.
- Why did Karl Marx dislike Earl Grey tea? Because all proper tea is theft.
- How was the Roman Empire cut in half? With a couple of Caesars.
- Which American President was least guilty? Lincoln because he was in a cent.
- Never take a victory for Grant-ed.